Funny Jokes >> 2009 August

    he’s in too far

    A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend. She was thrilled at the speed. “If I do 200mph, will you take off your clothes?” he asked. “Yes!” said his adv

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    It is snowing

    A trucker stops at a red light and a blonde catches up to him. She knocks on the window and says, “Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load.” The trucker just ignores her, the light changes, and he proceeds down the street. At the next light, the blonde again catches up and says, “Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load.” He ignores her again and continues down the street. At the next red light the blonde catches up, all out of breath, knocks on the window and says, “Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load.” The trucker looks at her and finally he says, “Hi, my name is Kevin, it’s snowing, and I’m driving a salt truck.”
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    The Ugly Truth

    A young woman and her newborn baby get on a bus. The bus driver looks at the baby and screams in horror at the sight of it.The woman is upset but doesn't know what to do, so she just marches to the ba

    Tags: Adult jokes  Funny Jokes  The Ugly Truth  

    Why Men Are Happier

    NICKNAMESIf Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla an

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    Free Fridge

    Some guy bought a new refrigerator for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying:“Free to good home. You want it, you take it.”For t

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    Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

    Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity.

    1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

    2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

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    Weight Loss Program

    A fellow was reading the paper one day lamenting the fact that his doctor has ordered him to lose 75 pounds. Next thing he sees is an advertisement for a guaranteed weight loss program. He's skeptical, but says to himself, "Let's see what they can do." He calls them on the phone and subscribes to the 3 day, 10 LB weight loss program.

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    The Telepathic Watch

    A very handsome and even more confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.The woman noti

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    Interview with a General

    Note this is an exact replication of National Public Radio interview between a female broadcaster and US Army General Reinwald, who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military installation.

    FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your post?

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    Check Your Kid's Homework

    Here's the message the teacher received the next day: Dear Mrs. Jones, I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer. I work at Home Depot and I told my daughter how hect

    Tags: Funny Pictures  kids jokes